Recommendation #3

"I take my Swiss Kriss, man, they keep you rollin'. Old Methuselah, he'd have been here with us if he had known about them."

— Louis Armstrong in [The Louis Armstrong Story] by Max Jones & John Chilton, pg. 220.

#3. Swiss Kriss

So, seeing the need for another recommendation, I present you with an item that has greatly enhanced the quality of my life. I will admit, I have been hesitant to confer this to you since the matter is a bit, shall I say, awkward? But since everyone poo's, I thought this product would be useful for all.

Yes, I know. There are so many other things, Nichole, that you could have expounded upon that are far less gross. Like toe-socks, Hewlett Packered and Blistix, but I will remind you that this blog is a collection of things that I have found to be laudable and none of those things fit the bill.

Now, I've thought this through and through and have wondered how I might present this delightful addage to anyone's medicine cabinet without resorting to the use of vulgarities; such as: bowels, regularity, fiber, smooth, hard and dare I say, watery. I commit to you that I will do my best, but seeing as pooping has never been an entirely "behind closed doors" kind of thing in my home I apologize before hand for any amount of discomfort that this post may cause. It might help you to know that I have already resigned myself to the idea that I will most likely not receive any comments.

Now, onto the very subject this post pertains to! Swiss Kriss: Natural Herbal Laxative. As it states on it's website, the product contains: "the gentle laxative effect of senna with the digestive benefits of papaya leaves and centaury herbs, the anti-spasmodic benefits of calendula and caraway, the anti-gas benefits of peppermint leaves, parsley and anise, the tonic benefit of lemon verbena, the mild diuretic benefit of dandelion leaves, the relaxing benefit of peach tree leaves and the natural flavoring of hibiscus flowers." In other words, it's homeopathic. Which, for my four younger brothers is code name for Hippie.

I came upon Swiss Kriss two summers ago while I was on Vacation in New York. My Aunts, with whom I was staying with, are both R.N.'s/homeopathic nurses and upon complaining of my uncooperative colon quickly prescribed two tablets of the stuff. I reluctantly chugged them down with a glass of water and took note of their grassy taste and hint of lemony flavor. I honestly, didn't think much of it since my Aunt's have also taken care of hurt knees by hanging crystals over them...I wasn't skeptical, I just wasn't expecting anything grandiose. Would you believe it but after 15 mins I felt like a fright train was about to explode out of my backside and sprinted to the bathroom. I was not to be disappointed. Swiss Kriss had struck gold. I have tried my fair share of "gentle stimulants" and all of them have either made my bum feel like I had a bad case of diaper rash or reduced my bowels to a watery mess that would go on for days. Not so with Swiss Kriss, it simply detoxes and cleans you out. Also, I am a big fan of the use of plants and not chemicals to treat my digestive issues.

I know that consistent constipation is not uncommon for people nowadays. It seems that the more we simplify our lives the more we cram stuff into them leaving very little time for the bare necessities. Eating, sleeping, fill in the blank and pooping. We are under an extreme amount of stress as well. A successful visit to the loo requires time and relaxation, both of which I have very little of in my life. To further complicate matters, I am often traveling. Routine is vital for regularity and with all the here and there'ing in my life, I would be lost and not to mention very backed up without the aid of my Swiss Kriss. Even good 'ole Louie Armstrong felt as I do!

So, I urge you to take a gander and try it out. You won't be disappointed.

You can find Swiss Kriss at any of your local health food stores, your friendly neighborhood GNC or you can purchase it online: Hippie Store. Also, since it is sure to work I wouldn't recommend taking it before a business meeting or boarding a plane.

P.S. Since guys have resolved to live in a fantasy world where girls do not poop, this, I realize, may have been difficult to accept for some. My hope is that the men who follow my blog feel more comfortable with the matter and have now graduated beyond this primitive viewpoint.